Divorce, Debt, and Finances

Breaking Up is Hard to Do—Don’t Let Debt Make it Worse

CoachSuzanne — Wed, 02 May 2012 12:11:00 GMT

Marriage is complicated. There are so many things that tie you and your partner together when you are married; assets, insurance, and yes debt. As a married couple your finances in most cases become completely entwined making them difficult to untangle after a divorce.

The assets are typically handled in your divorce settlement, insurance can be taken care of by a qualified agent and then there's debt. Debt can be tricky to navigate as a divorce settlement can "award" the debt to one or both of you, but if the debt was joint the credit card company won't care-they just want their money. Credit card companies aren't bound by divorce settlements, so they can actually go after you for jointly incurred debt if your former spouse doesn't pay. Yikes!

So what can you do to get rid of joint debt and begin your new "debt free" life?

Here are a few tips to follow when divorce is looming or in the process and joint debt is in the mix.

Eliminate Joint Debt

Financial experts recommend that you exit your marriage with NO joint debt. The ultimate goal is to remove each partner's liability for joint debt. There are several ways you can make this happen.

Inventory the debt. The only way to be sure what joint accounts are still "open" is to pull your credit. This is a very important step in ensuring you don't miss anything. Carefully review reports from all three credit bureaus to ensure that each joint account is accounted for.
Pay off joint cards together. Develop a plan to pay off any joint debt prior to the dissolution of your marriage. For example each partner is responsible for a debt payment on each of the joint accounts each month.
Divide the debt. You can take the joint debt and divide it by transferring a part of the remaining balance to a card that is in your name alone. For example, Mr. & Mrs. Have a joint account with $5000. Mr. transfers $2500 to an individual account he has or pays his $2500. Mrs. does the same with her $2500 and the joint debt is paid off. Be sure to close this account to ensure neither of you is tempted to charge it up again.

Once the debt has been accounted for and divided up now its time to develop a plan for your portion of the joint debt.

Develop a plan

You don't want to be left with a pile of debt joint or otherwise and not have a plan in place to pay it off. Here are a few options when it comes to debt repayment.

Use joint savings. If you and your soon to be ex are on good terms you may consider using your joint savings to pay off debts and give each of you a fresh start. If the divorce is a bitter one, or there isn't any savings you will need to find another way to eliminate the joint debt.
Consider credit counseling. Starting your new life in debt will be a challenge. By consulting with a credit counseling service you may be able to join either a debt management or debt settlement plan to pay off the debt more quickly and receive the advice and support you need to make it through these tough times.
Bankruptcy. Often considered a last resort it may be your only option for eliminating the joint debt you can't afford to pay on your single income. If you are still "legally" married, you should file at the same time so that neither of you gets stuck with joint debt. Be sure to consult with a trusted Bankruptcy attorney and exhaust all of your other options first.

However you decide to handle joint debt be sure to see it through. It is important to continue to monitor your credit reports until the debt is paid off completely or is shown to have been moved to your respective individual accounts. There is nothing worse than being hit with collections for unpaid debt years down the road when you are settled into your new budget, life etc.

Check out divorce support blogs for more information on navigating divorce.

Did you take the proper steps to ensure joint debt was paid off during your divorce?

Photo Credit

From Divorce' to Millionaire: Are You on Track?

Healthy & Wealthy After Divorce

Suzanne Cramer

Suzanne is a certified credit counselor and a Social Media Specialist for CareOne Debt Relief Services. Suzanne writes for Divorce, Debt and Finances and A Straight Talk on Debt. Follow Suzanne on Twitter @SuzanneCramer1 and @AskCareOne where she shares her insights on divorce and managing your finances.

A Reorganization of Your Finances

CoachSuzanne — Mon, 09 Apr 2012 13:00:00 GMT

Spring is upon us and I feel the urge to purge, excess clutter that is. The same can be done with your finances. After facing a divorce it can be tough to look at the mountains of paperwork and files that are lying all over your desk, but it is definitely a necessary task.

So with some "spring" in your step take advantage of your good mood and tackle organizing your finances.

Start with the Paperwork

Chances are you still have some of your ex's old pay stubs and utility bills from your marital home mingling with the current bills and other important stuff. Here are some tips on what you need to keep and for how long. Just remember to run the trash through the shredder.

What to Keep Forever

Passports
Social Security Cards
Birth and death certificates
Citizenship paperwork
Military records
Marriage and divorce decrees and certificates
Wills, living trusts, and powers of attorney

The 7 Year Itch

Keep these documents for 7 years, in case of an audit.

Information on home purchases and sales, titles, etc.
Old tax returns, W-2s, and any 1099s
Information about rental property
Receipts for improvements you have made to homes
Year end brokerage statements

Say Goodbye

Paycheck stubs (wait for your year end W-2, then pitch)
Bank statements (Upon receipt of your year end statement-toss them)
Insurance policies (upon receiving your renewal statement)
Receipts for purchases (After they have been reconciled or for warranty purposes)

Develop a System

Be sure to find a safe place for the "keep forever" documents such as a safety deposit box or safe kept in your home. After purging the excess papers decide how you will organize what remains. Here are a few of my favorite ideas:

Binders. Create a binder for each of these categories: utilities, financial statements, credit cards, and miscellaneous. Include six months of what you have on hand and place each month’s bill or statement in the appropriate binder. The beauty of the binder system is ease of use and a clutter free desk!
Filing cabinet. Using the same principle as the binders, create a file for each of the categories and be sure each statement or bill finds its home.
Electronic filing. While there are certainly a few more steps involved you can keep all of your files electronically without having papers lying around. All you need to do is create folders on your computer and scan or copy them to their designated folder.

Spring is the perfect time to embrace the "out with the old, in with the new philosophy". Say goodbye to accumulated financial clutter from when you were married and hello to the new, organized, single you.

Check out

divorce support blogs for more information on navigating divorce.

7 Things Divorce Has Taught me About Money

From Divorce' to Millionaire: Are You on Track?

Healthy & Wealthy After Divorce

Suzanne Cramer

Taxes after Divorce: A New Set of Rules

CoachSuzanne — Wed, 29 Feb 2012 13:54:00 GMT

Let's face it when you are going through a divorce you are not thinking about Uncle Sam, he isn't even on the radar. However, when things settle down it's important for you to take some time to understand your new tax situation particularly if you have kids.

I have been filing my taxes for years, with the help of TurboTax. Of course I am not an accountant by any stretch of the imagination, but I have been flying solo for the past seven years or so and am happy to say I have not been audited (knock on wood).

When I started preparing my taxes it was for both my husband and I, but as the story goes we got divorced and tax filing that first year was pretty complicated. I had new tax situations to learn about and some decisions to make.

What was my filing status going to be?
Who would claim our son as a dependent?
Who would get the tax credit?
Would I have to pay taxes on the recent sale of our home?

Overwhelmed by questions I couldn't answer I tasked myself with finding the answers. To make sure you are answering these questions correctly you will need to have your divorce settlement and custody agreements on hand.

Joint, Married filing separately, Head of household, Single?

Your tax filing status is determined by the status of your marriage on the last day of the year. If your divorce is final anytime before December 31, you can file as single, or head of household.

If your divorce proceedings and paperwork aren't complete by December 31, then as far as the IRS is concerned you're still married and you have to file either a joint return or married filing separately.

What status scores you the best outcome? Typically head of household, In order to file as head of household you must meet several conditions in addition to having your divorce finalized prior to December 31.

You must file a separate return from your ex.
You must have paid more than half of the cost of maintaining your home for the year. (For example: In my case we separated in May and I bought my own place, so I qualified as I maintained the home my son and I lived in for the majority of the year.)
Your ex must not have lived in the home at all for at least the last six months of the year.
You can claim a dependent that lived with you for the majority of the year. (For example: I was awarded full custody of our son with my ex receiving visitation, therefore I qualified).

Claiming a Dependent

This is often a tricky topic for many recently divorced couples. Who gets to claim the kids as dependents to score the additional deduction?

In my case I was considered the custodial parent as our son lived with me 99% of the time and "visited" his dad. I qualified to claim the dependent deduction because our son lived with me for a longer period of time than he did with his dad.

In order for my ex to claim our son as a dependent I would have to sign a waiver saying that I won't claim our son. (This will not happen.)

Getting the Credits

If you're the parent who claims the dependent exemption, you're also the one who gets to claim some other credits that may help to improve your bottom line.

Child credit. The Child Tax Credit is an important tax credit that may be worth as much as $1,000 per qualifying child depending upon your income.
American Opportunity higher education credit. The American Opportunity Tax Credit modifies the existing Hope Credit for tax years 2009 and 2010　under ARRA. The credit　was extended to apply for tax years 2011 and 2012 by the Tax Relief and Job Creation Act of 2010. (My son is still young so I only receive the child credit right now. I will look forward to the credit for higher education credits when he gets older.
Child care credit. You may be able to claim the credit if you pay someone to care for your dependent who is under age 13 who is not able to care for himself or herself. The credit can be up to 35% of your expenses. To qualify, you must pay these expenses so you can work or look for work.

So if you are the custodial parent you can claim these credits as well.

Sold your Marital Home

Capital-gains, the giant elephant in the room for anyone selling their home. If you and your ex sold the marital home the law allows you to avoid capital gains tax on the first $250,000 of gain on the sale of your primary home if you have owned the home and lived there at least two years out of the last five. Luckily my ex and I had owned the home for five years and well were not forced to pay the capital gains tax.

Here are a few other scenarios:

If you are still married as of December 31 and choose to file jointly you can exclude up to $500,000 as long as either one of you has owned the residence, and both used it as a primary home for at least two out of the last five years.

If you are considered divorced after December 31 and chose to file individually you and your ex can each exclude up to $250,000 of gain on your individual returns.

Filing your taxes after divorce can be tricky so be sure to understand your situation and your divorce settlement agreement. If you are not sure if you qualify for a deduction or credit be sure to contact a divorce support blog, tax professional or your attorney. Uncle Sam is not very forgiving of mistakes when it comes to his take.

How did you fare the first time you filed your taxes after your divorce?

Photo Credit

From Divorce' to Millionaire: Are You on Track?

Healthy & Wealthy After Divorce

Suzanne Cramer

Financial Discipline for You & Your Kids

CoachSuzanne — Wed, 15 Feb 2012 12:00:00 GMT

As a divorced, single mom discipline for my son falls on me 99% of the time. Sometimes that means punishment; taking away TV and video games, or having him complete tasks he does not enjoy, such as writing sentences. Discipline by definition is:

The practice of training people to obey rules or a code of behavior, using punishment to correct disobedience.

So I am teaching him to follow the rules by using punishment as a consequence for not following the rules. Teaching your children right from wrong is tough; and usually involves a fair amount of tears, door slamming, and "I hate you mom!" However discipline is a necessary part of parenting, training your children that rules exist to keep them safe.

So what does discipline have to do with finances? Being financially responsible is a skill all children need as they make their journey to adulthood. Unfortunately, many parents struggle themselves when it comes to applying discipline to their finances.

Back to basics

In raising our children to become responsible adults, part of the process is teaching them to be financially responsible and much of that is learned by example. Kids today are modeling the behavior they see their parents exhibiting and unfortunately those behaviors include poor work ethic, lack of savings, and masses of debt. They have learned from us that it's "ok" to spend money you don't have, because you can just charge it.

Hard work = rewards. Give your child a few daily tasks and chores that are to be performed without being asked. In return they receive a paycheck in the form of an allowance.
Financial independence. Give your child the freedom to choose how to use their "paycheck"; by allowing them to make the decision to spend or save they gain insight into the value of money. Think of all the valuable lessons you have learned when you've lost money, blew money on something frivolous, or saved up for something you really wanted.
Saving for a rainy day. Have your child open a savings account. Many adults live for the moment and neglect to put aside money for emergencies, goals, and retirement. Change your child's I want it and I want it now mentality by practicing what you preach and regularly contributing to savings and encourage them to do so as well.
Budgeting works. One of the most important things to teach a child is budgeting skills. Teaching the value of budgeting includes emphasizing spending less than you earn. For a young child who receives a $5 "paycheck" have them place funds into 3 different piggy banks: spend, save, and goal. Responsible spending is an important life lesson. Don't give in to requests for an "advance" that's just like using a credit card to purchase things you don't have the money for.

Stop the Cycle

There are a number of obstacles that stand in our way when it comes to financial discipline. For starters, many of us didn't get much of an education on personal finance while in school or from our parents. Over time we haven't practiced the basics and unfortunately that has led to millions of Americans being in debt, unprepared for retirement, with little to no emergency fund.

Many of us aren't even aware of what our debt really costs us. We look at the balances on our credit card statements and figure out how much we owe. But we don't take the interest or number of payments it will take to pay off the credit card into account. So we don't really know what our debt looks like, or think about how it affects our future.

Another obstacle that stands in our way is not looking at our debt as part of our retirement plan. What I mean by that is the money that you spend on debt, the interest and fees that you pay on it, are taking away from the money that you could be putting away for retirement. So doesn't it make sense to spend more money on your future than on your credit card bills? Sure it does, but most of us don't have a picture of where we are with our debt, or how to fix the problem.

If you are struggling with debt it's time to develop a plan to get out. Start with getting back to the basics of personal finance. Yes the same ones you should be teaching your children. Discipline yourself to pay down your debt, create an emergency fund and start saving for retirement. If you take action your kids will take notice-they model your behavior, so make good choices!

What financial discipline do you follow religiously and teach your kids?

Photo Credit

Suzanne Cramer

7 Things Divorce Has Taught me About Money

CoachSuzanne — Wed, 21 Dec 2011 13:48:00 GMT

Going through a divorce teaches you many life lessons. Following a divorce support blog helps. For instance I learned that, I am okay on my own, being me is more important then being something I am not, I don't need anyone to take care of me.

Aside from the life lessons I've also learned some important money lessons that have shaped and will continue to affect my financial life.

Here are my seven money lessons learned

Money earned on my own is worth more than money earned by someone else. I have worked since I was sixteen years old and there is something about earning money that gives you a sense of pride and accomplishment. After my son was born my ex begged me to stay home full-time; I was miserable and we ended up compromising and I went back part-time. I loved my son and spending time with him but I needed to feel I was accomplishing tasks outside of feeding him and changing diapers, it was part of my self fulfillment. I have many stay at home mom friends and I think many would agree earning money on your own instead of receiving an allowance from your spouse makes a big difference.
Having debt stinks. In my married life we lived pretty carefree, we had a car payment and a mortgage not unlike many couples today, but no credit card debt. After my divorce I found it tough the first few years to survive on my income alone and fell into the trap of using credit cards to cover bills. It was a vicious cycle but with hard work and patience I paid them off and vowed never to use them that way again.
Having a "financial plan" is essential. Without having a plan you are planning to fail. The first step is setting up a budget, and sticking to it. Then work on your long and short term goals. Don't forget about insurance and will planning especially if you have kids.
Money does not equal happiness. True happiness does not come from having things, or money. When I was married we had a lot of "things" 2 nice cars, a beautiful home, a boat, a motorcycle and a hot tub. On the outside it looked as if we were living an idyllic life but behind closed doors I was miserable.
Lending money to friends and family is almost always a mistake. One thing I've come to realize is that lending money to family or friends is almost never turns out well. If you're going to give money to family, give it and don't lend it. By the same token, don't co-sign. There is usually a reason why someone needs a co-signer. You can check out my story here, Fool Me Once Shame on You, Fool Me Twice Shame on Me.
Start saving as early as you can. The earlier you start saving for your future, the better off you'll be. Interest that you earn on your money compounds at an amazing rate if you start saving early. The wonders of compounding interest! It's never too late to start!
Check you credit annually. This is especially important after divorce as things you thought were taken care of during your divorce end up coming back to haunt you. To check your credit report for free once a year go to www.annualcreditreport.com

I truly believe going through a divorce builds character and can change your entire view on life and your finances.

What money lessons have you learned from your divorce?

More From Divorce, Debt and Finances:

Healthy & Wealthy After Divorce

The “Sticking” Budget

From Divorce' to Millionaire: Are You on Track?

Suzanne Cramer

Suzanne is a certified credit counselor and a Social Media Specialist for CareOne Debt Relief Services. Suzanne writes for Divorce, Debt and Finances and A Straight Talk on Debt. Follow Suzanne on Twitter @ADivorcedMom and @AskCareOne where she shares her insights on divorce and managing your finances.

Look at the Big Picture and be Thankful

CoachSuzanne — Wed, 07 Dec 2011 14:23:00 GMT

It can be difficult to be thankful when your world is turned upside down. For many of us this year has been a difficult one, myself included. I'm not looking for pity, but over the course of a year I have been through a divorce and the diagnosis of Type 1 Diabetes for my son; and well the financial strife that goes along with these two major life changing events.

I have learned a lot about myself over the past year and as we approach the holidays I am fully prepared to be thankful for all that I have and all that is to come.

Giving Thanks in All Situations

There are many things I am thankful for despite life's unexpected curveballs I've been through this year...

My son. Out of all of my accomplishments thus far in life this is the one I am most proud of. Despite all that my son has been through; a divorce, having to move and change schools, and his diagnosis he remains positive, inquisitive, and always has a smile. His strength and positive attitude have led him to be a stellar student, a force to be reckoned with on the wrestling mat and on the lacrosse field, and an inspiration to all of his friends. While I can't take full credit for all of his intellectual and personality traits I can take credit for raising him on my own for the past six years; and while challenging it has been the most amazing experience and has brought me joy every day.
My career. There is truly something to be said about waking up every morning and honestly being able to say, "I love what I do." Not everyone can say this and I can, for this I am truly grateful. My position enables me to combine all of the things I love to do and gives me the opportunity to learn something new each day. I have the ability to help people, be creative, share my knowledge, meet someone new each day (even if it is only online) and work with an amazing talented group of people.
My health. When I was younger I didn't realize the importance of good health. Today with rising health insurance costs and the hidden risks associated with poor health I know that I am lucky. A few years back I had to have two major surgeries over a two year time frame it was then that I realized just how thankful I am for good health.

Things Could Be Worse

My life is not easy and I am quite certain there are many of you that feel the same way. It's difficult to be thankful when you are struggling with things like unemployment, divorce, medical issues, and debt, but I am quite sure you are not alone. Members of our CareOne Community share their stories everyday and as they do I take a look at my life and realize just how thankful I am for the things I have been blessed with.

If you are struggling with debt, going through a divorce, have been diagnosed with a serious medical issue, or any of life's other twists it may seem like there is no end in sight and that things are hopeless, but guess what they're not!

You can do this, you can get out of debt, you can get on with your love life, you can handle medical issues; you just need a bended ear, a plan, and the courage to ask for help.

The holidays are just one of the times to reflect on what you are thankful for. I encourage you to take time out each day to be thankful for something. Maybe it's your morning cup of coffee, your co-worker that made you laugh, hearing your child's sweet little voice on the phone, whatever makes you stop a second and smile. I promise that you will instantly feel better despite what life throws your way.

So what are you thankful for?

More From Divorce, Debt and Finances:

Healthy & Wealthy After Divorce

The "Sticking" Budget

From Divorce' to Millionaire: Are You on Track?

Suzanne Cramer

Suzanne is a certified credit counselor and a Social Media Specialist for CareOne Debt Relief Services. Suzanne writes for Divorce, Debt and Finances and A Straight Talk on Debt. Follow Suzanne on Twitter @ADivorcedMom and @AskCareOne where she shares her insights on divorce and managing your finances.

From Divorce' to Millionaire: Are You on Track?

CoachSuzanne — Wed, 02 Nov 2011 13:05:00 GMT

Divorce takes its toll in many ways; financially speaking a divorce can be devastating and it's important to make your financial health a priority. Many things will be changing with your finances as you go through your divorce and for years to come.

To better prepare yourself for your future it's important to take steps to save for retirement, emergencies, and goals you may have. Saving is an intricate piece of your financial puzzle and needs to be re-evaluated post divorce.

As a couple you and your ex hopefully had a savings plan in place for retirement, emergencies and future goals but with divorce, your needs will most likely change. Let's find out if you are financially on track.

Have you figured out what you need to retire?

Many of us haven't, according to the Retirement Confidence Survey, Only about four out of ten of us have tried to calculate what it would take for a comfortable retirement, and one-third of those who have can't remember what figure they came up with. Without knowing how to get where you need to be how can you develop a plan to get there?

CNN Money offers a simple yet effective retirement calculator to help you determine what you need to save today for your future.

Do you save a portion of your income regularly?

According to MSN Money the current U.S. savings rate is below 1 percent; are you part of that 1%? If so, let me stress to you the importance of saving at least 5% of your income; coupled with investing you can continue to grow your nest egg for a comfortable retirement.

Do you pay off your credit cards every month?

Carrying a balance on your credit cards is a dangerous trap to fall into. That balance may be costing you more than you think each month in interest and fees.

Responsible credit card use involves paying off your balance each month and making timely payments, failure to do so results in higher interest rates and late fees.

If you are currently only paying the minimums or are getting behind on payments now is the time to develop a plan for paying down your debt. If you are not sure how to get started consider reviewing this article on your debt relief options.

Are you protecting what you have?

After divorce it is imperative that you review all of your insurance plans and make any necessary changes.

Health insurance
Life insurance
Auto insurance
Homeowners or rental insurance

Today millions of Americans are without health insurance or adequate coverage; the financial losses suffered by an unexpected medical emergency are enough to frighten anyone.

Are you taking the right steps to achieve your financial goals? Saving is not always easy especially when a divorce changes everything. Making savings a line item in your budget will help you to pay yourself first and help prepare you for the unexpected and your future.

More From Divorce, Debt and Finances:

Healthy & Wealthy After Divorce

The “Sticking” Budget

Are You Still Responsible for Debt After Divorce?

Suzanne Cramer

When One Child Is More Than Enough

AliciaHarper — Mon, 31 Oct 2011 14:37:00 GMT

One day while I was at the beauty salon getting all dolled up, my Hair Dresser inquired about Aiden. She's met him on several different occasions and simply adores his spunky personality. So much so that each time I go in for a hair appointment, she asks about him. It's typically the usual questions ("How is he?"), comments ("He's speaking so clearly"), and exclamations ("I can't believe he's getting so big!").

Then the dreaded question - "So, when are you having another child?"

Hmmm.

My Hair Dresser knows that I am a single Mother so I told her that I have no plans to have another child any time soon. I also informed her that I'd like to continue with my career path (since I recently completed graduated school), meet someone, build a relationship with them, and then maybe try for another child. Maybe.

Her response? "That's so selfish of you! Having a second child is not for you, it's for Aiden! He needs someone to play with."

Hmmm.

Hold up. When did my reproductive decisions become an approved topic for "Beauty Parlor etiquette?" Is my reproductive decision an approved topic for "Beauty Parlor etiquette?"

Didn't think so.

The thing is, as any caring parent does, I want to be able to provide the best things in life for Aiden - a good education, a nice home, meaningful extra-curricular activities, lovely people in his entourage. All those things cost money, save for the lovely people in his entourage (but I'm beginning to think that even that costs money).

As a single Mother, sometimes that presents a challenge in and of itself because of the financial sacrifices that I must make. And, don't get me wrong, I don't mind making those sacrifices. At all.

But financial sacrifices aside, as much as I love being Aiden's Mother (and with all my heart, I do), it's really not enough. For me. I often hear women say that when they are at work, they are simply waiting for the time to pass until they can get home to be with their children. And I can agree with them, but only to a certain extent.

I love my job and when I'm at work, I love being at work. It's part of who I am and I wouldn't trade that. The idea of splitting my time at home between more than one child seems like the equivalent of tying one's shoelace without thumbs.

Not to mention that as a Mother, the worrying never ends. I don't think that I've slept soundly for the entire night since Aiden was... well, born. I wake up in the middle of the night all the time. If it's not to check up on him or to scare monsters away or to take him to the bathroom, it's because my mind won't let me stop thinking about the million and one things that I'll have to complete the next day. And the day after that. And the week after that. And the month after that.

It can be downright exhausting.

But it's not. Most of the time. And I feel that it's because I've learned how to manage my time with just one kid. He's happy, he's healthy, and he's blessed beyond measure. And I'm happy, healthy and blessed beyond measure too.

So... until the Love Gods look down on me in favor and all the stars align for Mr. Right and I to meet, greet, and fall in love, my cute little family of two will remain just that - a family of two.

At this moment in life, that's more than enough for us.

Alicia Harper

Alicia Harper, M.A., Ed.M. is a single mother, blogger, and recent graduate of Columbia University. Her life is filled with all things pink, except for the one bit of blue - her rambunctious 3-year-old son. Together they make a great pair, and Alicia chronicles the trials and triumphs of being a young, single mother living in NYC at Mommy Delicious.

Healthy & Wealthy After Divorce

CoachSuzanne — Wed, 12 Oct 2011 12:07:00 GMT

Breakups are often the catalyst for change; a new you and new goals for your future. Unfortunately, we often use every excuse in the book to keep us from reaching those goals.

Now is the time to take a stand for you and resolve to be healthy, and wealthy. You can do it, here's how!

Budget Time for You

After going through the trials and tribulations of a divorce many of us find ourselves out of shape and out of cash; the first step to a new you involves budgeting time for you. The time could be used for mental, physical or financial health. The point is, it is for you; not your job, not the kids, and not your family.

Mental health

Consider talking to someone. Divorce is one of the leading causes of depression. If you feel you are headed in this direction check your insurance plan and see if mental health assistance is covered. Schedule a visit with a psychologist or behavioral health specialist to just talk it out. Not thrilled with the idea of professional help? Find a trusted friend to confide your feelings and emotions to; just getting it all out there can make a huge difference.
Find your inner peace. I would have never considered taking yoga, but a close friend invited me to join her one Saturday morning and I loved it! It was an hour of breathing, stretching, and contortionist poses, but I left feeling at peace with myself.
Take up a new hobby or pick up an old one again. I used to love to read, but when I was married there seemed to be little time for it. So I fell in love with reading again and often find myself lost in a good book.

Physical health

No gym membership required. You don't need an expensive gym membership to get fit! Take a walk around your neighborhood, jog your local high school track, or consider riding your bike at a nearby state park. Just being outdoors can be a mood booster and soon you will find you look forward to daily exercise.
Just say no to fad diets. You may be feeling overweight and out of shape but this is no reason to jump on the fad diet bandwagon. Instead, learn to eat healthy and make it a habit. Trade in your fast food lunches for healthy ones made at home, shop the perimeter of the grocery store and consider joining a free online diet plan.
Grab a buddy. For some reason we all seem to do better with sticking to our goals when we have a buddy along for the ride. Find a friend, neighbor or relative to help keep you honest with your workouts and your new healthy lifestyle.

Financial Health

Create a Budget. Take the time to track expenses first so you can start off on the right foot. Now that you have a benchmark you can create a budget that works with your fixed and variable expenses that keeps you from being in the red each month.
Pay down debt. Depending on your situation you may be dealing with debt from your divorce. In order to be as financially healthy as possible you will want to develop a plan of attack for your debt. If you are not sure where you stand take a few minutes to pull your credit and determine your debt load. If you find after completing your budget that there is not much room for debt payments consider your debt relief options.
Save, save, save. Easier said than done when your budget is already stretched to the max, but it is important to make saving a line item in your budget; pay yourself first!

I know firsthand what it is like to go through a divorce, I've been there. It seems as if your entire life is spiraling out of control, but the good news is you can make the changes you want to be mentally physically and financially fit. The power is in your hands...

What was your "defining" moment after your divorce; the one that made you look inside yourself and say I NEED to make changes to my life?

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Suzanne Cramer

The “Sticking” Budget

CoachSuzanne — Wed, 05 Oct 2011 13:30:00 GMT

Every aspect of divorce is difficult no matter how you look at it, especially when it comes to your finances.

Let's face the facts:

You have gone from two incomes to one.
You are no longer "splitting" expenses with someone.
Your rates on insurance are likely to rise.
And you probably got stuck with some debt from the divorce...sigh.

The best way to get yourself on track is to create a budget; that's the easy part.

The hard part is actually "sticking" to it.

Sticking to a budget takes work and sometimes we are to distraught, busy, or simply don't know how to stick to the budget we created.

The problem with most budgets is that they are set up with unrealistic expectations.

We are so focused on paying down debt, building an emergency fund and our retirement goals that we set the bar to high and subsequently fail leaving us discouraged.

So most importantly be sure your budget is realistic in terms of what you make (your income) and how you live day to day (your lifestyle).

5 Tips to help you Stick to Your Budget

Track expenses. Who has time to write down everything they spend? You do! This is a key component of sticking to your budget. By tracking every expense you are more "accountable" and at the end of the month you can see where you went wrong or what you did right. To make things easier try an internet-based free budget planner like budgetpulse.com.
Check yourself. Periodically throughout the month you should "check in" with your budget. Maybe your "overspending" in one category can be made up for in another.
Spend less than you earn. This is the easiest way to stick to your budget. Find little ways or make minor adjustments to keep you out of the red; that way if you go rogue one month and spend over budget you won't have to charge your groceries.
Treat yourself. If you are so vigilant in sticking to your budget that you don't allow yourself a lunch out once a month, eventually you will crumble and possibly binge by ordering take out every night the following month. Just like dieting, budgeting requires you to treat yourself now and then to things you have given up. Believe me the $5 footlong is not going to bust your budget as much as a month's worth of carryout.
Set a goal. It's funny how we can trick ourselves into doing things. We all want something to strive for and that's a good thing! So to reward yourself for a job well done at budgeting consider paying yourself. (See the $5 challenge)

Sticking to a budget doesn't have to be painful. The important thing is to set up a realistic budget that works for you.

Your hard work will provide valuable information that helps you plan your expenses better and keep you from whipping out the plastic!

What tips do you have for sticking to your budget?

More From Divorce, Debt and Finances:

Kids and Money - What Message Are You Sending?

Are You Still Responsible for Debt After Divorce?

The Good, The Bad, The Ugly...Your Credit After Divorce

Suzanne Cramer

Download a Free Budget Planning Template